Me the Caveman!

Hello Toronto!  What is the buzz?  I have to tell you it is awesome to be back blogging to you about my amazing city Toronto.  I hope you have been following my rants and raves on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook while I have been away from my blog!  It has been an absolutely crazy time since the last time we met.  The world was spinning with one less dictator and women still had the right to their own vijajays!  What the freak happened?  Well one thing is for sure, in all the crazy that is this blue marble spinning, one better take some time to distress and bloody well relax.  That’s just what this season of Bruce in the City is going to be all about.  Relax, detox and if that doesn’t work bitch about it until someone listens!  I’m going to do what any well mannered Torontonian would do, start with getting us back to some R & R!

I have to be honest.  I may have had a few freaky deaky days this winter where my stress levels were a little more than off the charts.  It’s true.  I, calm demur as always, and the level headed one.  Never overreacting and taking life in stride and by the balls.  Nothing phases me.  I’m not one of those who lives in the land of hysterics and blocks people on Facebook or threatens to leave social media every other day.  No, I with a vast amount of poise and dignity keep it real.  Face the day with my hat on straight and stand up to those who would have varying states of opposite and unacceptable opinions. I know thyself and embrace the days challenges with everything that says, “This is a guy to be proud of”.  I know it’s truly amazing and yet I have to tell you it is so stressful keeping up to the high status like spot in the world you have placed me.  I mean I’m the morning coffee man, there with you as you swallow your joe before facing another day.  This is how I know that before I jump off the deep end of irrational behaviours, one must book themselves for an outstanding spa day.  Or at least a spa hour.

I had the most wonderfully relaxing and health beneficial moments on Thursday evening.  It was my last day of work before my day job holiday, which I am enjoying as we speak, and I decided I would try out a little place up the street from my shop that’s called Salt Cave.  I had no idea what it was but the owner had been working on his building for many month updating it and such and he would stop into my shop and tell me a bit about what he was up to and he mentioned this salt cave thing.  Well I wasn’t really interested to tell you the truth; it sounded a bit hocus pocus for me.  Oh, “Hocus Pocus” I love that movie!  So anyway he got it done just recently and so when passing by the other day I thought what the hell I might as well stop by and poke around.

It is on the lower level.  They have an organic food place up top and I’m curious to try that out too at some point.  But anyway, I went down the stairs and just like in Gremlins when that dad goes into that Asian artifact store, this too had the feeling like I was entering another place and time.  A gentle, older Asian woman greeted me.  She actually looked at me like I had entered by mistake and was going to tell me the pizza place is on the corner but when I began to inquire about the salt cave she (with some apprehension) showed me around.

Awesome.  There are two rooms built.  One for a small group of people and one if you decide to go it alone.  Spaces filled with sand and dimmed lighting and salt I assume all on the walls.  Some lawn style chairs that are there to make you feel weightless I understand, and even a tent and beach toys and books for one to read.  I assume the toys are for children if families use the cave.

The salt is blown into the air and the lights are dimmed and the beautiful music plays in the background.  One hour in the salt cave is like spending three days by the ocean.  I was so relaxed I’m certain I farted.  I literally fell asleep in 10 minutes of being in the cave.  It felt cool yet warm inside the cave and the world was swept away.  The salt cleans the lungs and helps the immune system as well as conditions the skin and hair.  I actually own a salt lamp which I mentioned on my Twitter the other day.  It purifies the air in your home by getting rid of positive ions in the air.  What an outstanding way to start a holiday or as I like to call it, a staycation.  With all the nuts that’s going on I’m not even joking when I say you guys have got to distress yourselves.  The hour was only $35 and there is more to this place then just the salt caves.  Apparently $35 is an amazing price.  Some better known spas apparently charge quite a bit more.  I am going to try out their massage frequency thing next.

Check it out!
http://www.saltchamber.ca/#!
B.I.T.C

Editor

Mary Ellen Monk

About Bruce in the City

I have been writing my blog since 2010. I was inspired to do so after enjoying an amazing meal with some friends of mine here in Toronto. I decided to tell everyone about my great night and the fabulous restaurant I went to and shazam my blog was born!
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