Shitty Shows

Gay Ole Time!

Posted by Bruce on July 03, 2016
Customer Service Watchdog, Really?, Restaurants, Shitty Shows / No Comments

This week has been crazy fun! Let me just get that out there. Pride month has been a fabulous success in the city. Of course I got to take in Café California’s Men’s fashion under garment show (undies supplied by The Bay, Men supplied by God only knows) but unfortunately the show did not live up to it’s hype this year.
There were many empty tables and the new management and staff were pretty cool at best. Ok, so I have to admit, I remain a fan of Leticia and her husband who owned the place for I’m guessing 20 plus years! They really knew how to put on a party but you can tell the new owners are out for the big gay bucks.
They cut the three course pre fix meal down to two courses leaving off the best part… dessert! They of course charged about the same price. My food came with a side of what I could only guess was pubic hair. It certainly was a short and curly. To top it off when I brought it to the bus boy’s attention he proceeded to wipe it off with his finger. Now Lord only knows where it was before it hit my plate but I never saw anyone ever use their finger to remove a possible pubic hair from a dinner plate. He walked of with my plate and about 10 minutes later our server stopped by to quickly mention she would comp me a drink for the hair raising trouble. A manager never bothered to stop by at all. Utterly unacceptable!
They had a raffle going by which you could only get a raffle ticket if you purchased their $6 fun and furious mixed cocktail. Mine was basically a ball of uncrushed ice with some berry squirt on top. Terrible and no options for non drinkers so they never got to play. Tacky and irresponsible!!! Not to mention an obvious cash crab! I’m almost certain that’s illegal but don’t quote me. The good news was our buddies Ron and Allan won the draw so that was a bonus.
Unfortunately the boys were nothing to write home about. Who am I to talk. I wouldn’t be caught fully dressed on that runway let alone in my gotcha’s! Really though, they didn’t look like they wanted to be there and unlike all the other years they didn’t even make contact with the audience at all. Well just to this one girl in the window seat. They must have been straight. There was one model who came up to us after the show to ask if we enjoyed it and we lied. He was too cute to break his almost naked heart.
Here was the kicker. As soon as the show was over they had another seating which is normal from past events there. Our show ended at 7:30 p.m. The next show was to start at 8:30. John went to order some dessert and our server actually said well we really needed to clear out for the next show. What!%$#@$%#%$#! Between us all we must have spent like $400 bucks and we can’t even see the F&^$67$n dessert menu? Now I was just pissed to the nine’s!
I smiled and calmly said it would be nice to have dessert!!!! Now here is the best part; our server knew I was blogging about the event. This was the best they could do? I feel sorry for the poor buggers who weren’t blogging. This was the worst experience I have ever had at any restaurant in this fine Gay city. I will never go back! Like never ever!
Ron and Allan did there best to avoid a scene but I’m certain they could not have been impressed either. They’re world travellers. How could this measure up in anyway to the outstanding shows and events they must get to enjoy around the gay cities of the world?
In short Café California 0 kisses out of 5 on this one! It’s was definitely no Gay ole Time!!
I hope you all have an amazing Pride day today. Did I mention I’ll be in the Parade? No bitches I’m not a float! Look for me on the double decker bus for Proud Anglicans! Lost of love and kisses and never let hate fade out your rainbow!!
B.I.T.C
P.S.: I had to ask my server for that free drink! It was an ill tasting Caesar!
Cheers!

Edited by Mary Ellen Monk

Repo What You Sow-Rocky Horror-What a Ball part 2

Posted by Bruce on November 06, 2011
Announcements, Shitty Shows / 1 Comment

We came, we watched, we cringed. It was one thing to be seeing a shadow performance of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” but to have the night also include “Repo the Genetic Opera” it was a double feature picture show incarnate, staged with a shadow performance to kill! The place, The Toronto Underground Cinema, of course was the dwelling we would enjoy the first of two performances that night!

Ladies and Gentlemen!!!! Repo! I have mixed reviews about this musical? Part of me wants to like it and part of me wants to loath it. Sorta like the American version of X Factor! Just when you think “Hey this is not a bad show.” The judges make some bad decision to keep the wrong act! That happened last night and I couldn’t help but throw my double buttered popcorn at the T.V screen.  I mean they kept the group that lypsank…. hmmm is that a word?

Repo begins- the lights fade and the visual enema begins. The first number is this rap like song, with a strong chinned dead looking man… “and your organ come in a very small vase and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah….. You know after about 1 minute, that a lobotomy might be your only escape. It’s not really easy to leave the theater because the shadow performers are slinking up and down the isles. So I stay and begin the exercise of removing my shoulders from the turtle position every once in a while to release the agony. Now I have to say the theater was not at all as full as it became after the movie when the second feature “Rocky Horror” was about to begin. I don’t think the audience is the same, if you know what I mean. Rocky Horror is a cult classic and Repo is more like “Buckly’s” There are so many other options why even bother taking it. Unless of course you like that killer pine tree taste.

One moment of “Well this is kinda cool.” was when the director introduced the movie and thank everyone for coming. It made sense after I saw it “These idiots will go see anything.” was the possible inner dialogue.

Oh God I have gotten so wrapped up in running it down I never even took the time to tell you what it is about. I am so sorry, but anyway, it’s about a company “Cosco” no “Kresge’s”, “Esso” One second let me look this up!………..”GeneCo!!!”

In the year 2056 – the not so distant future – an epidemic of organ failures devastates the planet. Out of the tragedy, a savior emerges: GeneCo, a biotech company that offers organ transplants, for a price. Those who miss their payments are scheduled for repossession and hunted by villainous Repo Men. In a world where surgery addicts are hooked on painkilling drugs and murder is sanctioned by law, a sheltered young girl searches for the cure to her own rare disease as well as information about her family’s mysterious history. After being sucked into the haunting world of GeneCo, she is unable to turn back, as all of her questions will be answered at the wildly anticipated spectacular event: The Genetic Opera.

And that is it in a nut shell!!! There were a few highlights for me, not really from the movie but from the shadow performers. They were excellent and if it were not for them I’m not sure I could have sat through the whole movie without getting up to cruise the bathrooms. The actor that played “Repo Man” and the actress that played “The young girl” were very good and worked their parts very well. The one thing about a performance like this is that the actors don’t really get a break like a stage play because hell or high water they are on until the movie ends. The entire cast was excellent… I thought.

Well kids that’s about it for me this week. The Toronto Underground Cinema is a real gem and needs your support. Get out go so see some strange and wonderful works of art in motion picture. Regardless of whether or not you love the movie, you are sure to walk away with an experience that just might land on a blog some day!

Out of 5 kisses

Repo: 3

The Cinema: 5!!! Smack!

The Winner of the Halloween costume photo contest is….

Marcie!!!!!

Congratulations!!!

Your Tim’s card is on its way!

Horrific!

Posted by Bruce on June 05, 2011
Shitty Shows / No Comments

OK! I am about to chew my own arm off!  It’s Sunday afternoon May 29 and I did have plans to go see a classic showing of “The Sounds of Music” @ The Scotia Bank Theater” but decided to hit the gym and then spend an afternoon relaxing and catching up on some t.v!!!!  The gym was a great idea.  I had a great workout but I skimped on breakfast so I lost some steam when I got to the cardio part of my workout.  Hmmm What better place to get the steam back!!! The steam room! That’s just where I headed before heading home to start my afternoon of t.v catch up!

That is where I came across a program on T.L.C that made me want to throw my television out the window! It’s called Extreme Couponing.  Ever here of it?  This show in my opinion is the most insulting 1/2 hour of  time waisted I have ever seen.

The premise is that people save up a ton of coupons in order to get tons and I mean tons of stuff for free.  Sounds like a pretty cool idea at first “Free”until you begin to notice the underlining addiction problems of greed, hoarding and compulsive shopping that seems to fuel the peoples motives.

The scary twins are on my hit list (Tarin and Tai) for disgusting gluttony hoarding behaviour and on their birthday to. Well isn’t that special!

They have in their cupboards hundreds of items, many they admit to not even needing, like diapers and baby food and they have no children.  Their was no mention of giving anything to local charities, friends or anybody else for that fact and they just get off on holding people up at the market, stressing the hell out of the clerks and clearing the shelves of things shoppers might be shopping for, like vitamins etc. They stockpile cases of vitamins, toothpaste (ten box’s) and I don’t mean packages. I mean box’s with at least 100 tubes in each box!!! Don’t forget the antacids all stuffed on their shelves and there is no way they could use this stuff before the expiry date roles by, putting themselves at risk for poisoning.

They even spent the day getting free birthday treats around the city because of coupon use!!! Happy Birthday Ladies!

I am going to be sick. When I think of the people I watched on this show, I am angered at how they hoard all these items and really the difference they could make by donating these things to charities. Charity, remember charity….

It’s amazing the lengths people will go to get their sorry asses on the tube! 

Damn I should have gone to see “The Sound of Music”

I didn’t want this blog to get to long so I made a top ten list like Mr. Letterman to tell you what has got me so riled up about this damn show!

#10 No regard to expiry dates on food, vitamins, bathroom needs like toothpaste and antacids!!!!

#9 How they try to make gluttony a cool and acceptable behaviour

#8 Oh ya hoarding is great to don’t forget!

#7 Yes pile those cereal boxes on your basement floor by the dozens to attract all those bugs and mice.

#6 While your at it harass the hell out of managers and employees

#5 No consideration for the poor basters waiting in line behind you (some of these couponers take 1 to 2 hours to get through check out lines)

#4 Look at all their supplies isn’t that amazing just think of the families that have been affected by natural disasters recently. Send some of your stockpile to them. You creepy people!!!!!

#3 Let’s compulsive shop just because you can get it cheaper! Now that’s healthy!

#2 Clear those shelves bare!!!! Take everything like band-aids, toothpaste, diapers!!! so the next sucker can kiss your ass on the way out with nothing in hand!

And my number one reason this show makes me want to barf my guts out!!!!

#1  They got me to watch for a whole 1/2 hour!!!!

I’m an idiot! Never again!!!!

footnote: I’ve been watching now for over an hour so I can paint a clear picture of this evil incarnate. Oh wait the shows back on gotta go………Horrific!!!!!

Skip to toolbar