Russian Woody

Posted by Admin1 on September 09, 2015
Clubs and Bars, Really?

As promised the first of four Summer recaps!!!  I really enjoyed my time away from my blog I have to admit.  It was great to have a little down time and well, actually get busy doing all the other things in my life that needed attention!  With that said I am stoked to be back!!! Yes I said stoked!!!

It was a very hot evening in July when I decided I was going to get out on my own and take in a Drag Show in the heart of the Gay Village.  I hadn’t seen a Drag Show in quite some time, so instead of watching To Wong Foo or something, I thought better to get out and get my Drag on!drag

Woody’s on Church St. is a great place to check out the latest Queens and their lip syncing talents!  There is a “House Queen” of course who seems to host the whole thing; or at least she was this hot Summer night.  Not one to mess with, with unwelcomed heckling.  One guy new to the scene started yelling out a few unhealthy comments and I thought “She” was going to drop kick him over the rainbow.

I took a spot in a darker corner of the room.  I wasn’t really looking to make new friends.  My little round table was empty and seemed like the perfect spot to hide into the woodwork and enjoy the show.

Isn’t it always fate that when you just want to be alone…. you become surrounded by the giggliest little group of social butterflies in the room?

I sucked my Caesar and  they, a little riskier than I, swallowed their electric blue juice.  I could tell they had already had a few before I arrived.  Either that or they were just natural air heads. I was unable to know for sure.

We sat together and one of the guys decided to take up conversation with me.  “Have you been here before?”, “My buddy thinks your cute.”  Which I thought was nice since I could have been his older uncle or something but one’s never too old for a compliment.  I graciously said thank you and tried to look in the other direction. It was then that the barstool trio decided I was the perfect seat saver.  “Can you save our seats for us we need to smoke?”  I thought why not.  At least I could get back to what I wanted to be doing which was watch the show.

Twenty minutes later I was feeling like the biggest boob in the room.  Even bigger than the boob on stage.  Wow that guest Drag Queen Griselda or something was horrific! It’s bad enough when they don’t even sing but unable able to lip sync.  Unacceptable and really, I think people should boo but people will clap for anything.  The barstool trio had not returned and it seemed I was left holding the seats like a chump.

I decided to stop telling people the seats were saved and I secretly hoped that someone would sit down.  When to my surprise the barstool trio returned.  Noticeably lighter headed then when they left and this is when it got interesting.

They thanked me for holding their spots and actually bought me a drink.  A double Caesar.  I wouldn’t normally take a drink from a stranger in fear of some date rape drug laced in it but I was feeling rather risky after having few already.  I had  sip.  Everything seemed fine and the one guy began chatting me up.  I noticed an accent this time and asked where he was from.  In his proudest voice he exclaimed Russia.

I thought this interesting and pursued with more questions.  Was he visiting or does he live here??  Stuff like that.  A girl walked up at that point and noddlingly questioned our conversation.  I repeated and she introduced herself as his girlfriend.  I was a bit surprised.  I thought the guys were both gay.  Well now I was clear that only one of the two played for the home team.

The guy’s girlfriend and the hammered gay friend floated off to find more trouble no doubt.  While cute straight guy lingered along side me.
“So Russia?” I began.  Many questions were on my mind with all the stuff that seems to going on over there.
“Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?”  He had already made me aware that he had not been here in Canada for a long time.  A few years.  I believe maybe 6.
“What’s it like there for Gay people?  I see often that Gay people are mistreated by the Government, by their laws and by many people that seem to participate in bullying and violence against Gay people?”  He seemed annoyed at my questions almost immediately.  Granted, a pretty risky question but considering we were both sitting in a Gay bar it would have been an obvious moment for reflection.  But he was surprisingly pro Putin!
“What do you mean?  My government does not harass Gay people!” His brow lowering.  I knew right then my curiosity exposed itself to the wrong person.
“I just mean we see over here many examples of Gay oppression orchestrated by the Putin regime. Is this inaccurate?” I asked.
He promptly said yes. “Gay’s are always pushing their agenda on people and kids with their Pride march.” I was very confused.  Here was a guy laughing and enjoying the Drag Show and clearly comfortable with his gay friend but held strong to the way Putin rules the roost over there.
I had to push a little harder to try to understand.  In my friendly yet assertive way I asked, “So where do you fit in with all of this?  You don’t acknowledge the political issue surrounding the Gay people in Russia but you are here at Woody’s enjoying all the Gay that can be delivered?”
“Well my parents came here so I had to come.  And Canada has amazing health care.  That is why we came.  Gays are fine if the stay where they belong.  In places like this.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing but one thing was for sure, I needed to try and understand.  He was telling me about Canada’s propaganda about Russia and American’s propaganda about Russia and I was beside myself and questioning my own knowledge with what is going on over there.  I mean the truth is, we can’t ever leave it exclusively to the media can we?
As the robust Drag Queen continued her Celine Dion impersonation I knew I was at stalemate in our conversation as he was pretty confident that his opinion was the right one and that I had been brainwashed by the Canadian government and media.
I finished up my Caesar and decided it was time to move along.  I told him I did think it was fascinating to get his point of view on the subjects we discussed, because there were others, but I had to get going.  It was our last moments together that puzzled me the most.
He got up and offered to give me a hug.  The whole moment lasted about 1/2 a minute but it was long enough for me to feel what I could only surmise was my first and only experience with Russian Woody!!
B.I.T.C
467 Church St
Toronto, ON M4Y 2C5 Church-Wellesley Village, Downtown Core       
Edited by Mary Ellen Monk

Leave a Reply