Oh the drama that was my poem of last week! Sometimes you know you’ve just got to get that shit out of your system.
I’ve got a question for you guys. Have you seen the movie “When Harry Met Sally”? Well I have a million times. I thought Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal were completely flawless. It was brilliantly funny and of course there was a great supporting role played by the late Carrie Fischer. I thought she was really fun in that movie. The point is, Billy Crystal’s character makes a point of saying that men and woman could never be friends because the sex part would always get in the way. Well I always wondered what it would be like for straight people, men and woman, becoming friends with the sex part getting in the way. Is one of the parties always scheming to get into the other ones britches? So now the real question then for me is can two gay guys ever really be friends? When you think of the statement in “When Harry met what’s her face”, that seemed to be the entire premise of the movie and it has always had me thinking, can gay guys ever really be friends or is one or more of the parties always trying to get into the other guy’s jock strap? Well I recently met a friend over Facebook. Not something I’d ever recommend. But it happened. It started with “I think you’re cute” which was so nice because let’s face it, for any of you in a long term relationship getting any kind of attention can be a daunting task. Now I’m not here to rip into that almost five months of bromance but I do have to be honest, I fell for the guy. I know right. This was all about friendship and bonding and sharing stories and well let’s face it I’m in a basically successful 12 year relationship. It’s far from perfect but I do love the man. Nonetheless with every outing with this new friend I kept sinking deeper and deeper into that terrible haze of lust or love. The crazy thing was I couldn’t seem to say or do anything right. I mean I’m pretty eccentric I’ll admit, but when this guy was around I could barley utter a declarative sentence. I had to tell my partner because I couldn’t find myself lying about my feelings. We try to be as open as we can be about matters of the heart considering well, like I said, 12 years. As I sit at a small table at a fish and chip place I discovered just on the boarder of Scarborough and Pickering (of all the god forsaken places), I sat milling over some incredible fish and chips and thinking, “What the crap did I put this poor fellow through?” I mean he had no real idea I had fell head over heals for him. It wasn’t allowed. We were friends and there you have it; was I the Billy Chrystal to his Meg Ryan? Did I go to where gay friends are not to go? As I looked around this cute little mom-and- pop-fish-and-chips-under-the-sea-god-forsaken-place, I felt so embarrassed. I had opened up too much too fast. Laid most of my cards on the table and it was a bad hand. He actually asked me to never text him again. I became that weird stocker guy and I didn’t even mean to. I’m not saying he was perfect in this scenario but I’m usually much cooler about hanging it all out there. He was a bit insensitive I thought, but on the other hand I don’t think he had any clue how I ended up feeling about him. I was ridiculous and immature but hell it has been years since I felt those early shimmers of affection. I can’t be alone on this one!?
I blocked him. I had to. I was embarrassed. I put it all out there and I was the only one there. Thank God my partner is understanding. Damn this fish and chips was fabulous. I was so consumed with thought, I almost missed writing down the address of this cute place. Check it out. You can sit in my spot by the window and have the fantastic fish and chips and think of me. The guy who didn’t follow Billy Chrystal’s advice, men and women or in my case two gay men, can never really be friends because the sex stuff always gets in the way! Please allow me to crawl back into my conk shell. Ya and by the way the sweet potatoe fries were fabulous too. The sad thing is the only thing smelling like fish was me!
Port Union Fish and Chips
65 Rylander Blvd
Editor Mary Ellen Monk